Okay, here’s a fictional essay I JUST NOW wrote for Science class. Long story. We had to describe five objects of matter–Water, air, a rock, a piece of paper, and a pom-pom, using a fictional 1-page story with at least three adjectives for each of the objects.
The first three-water, air, and the rock- reminded me of something. My favorite TV show. Avatar: The Last Airbender. So I decided to do a spoof for my essay.
Without furthur adou…. the Fifth Element.
“Earth, Water, Air, and Paper… in a land where the four elements were controlled by people with the power to manipulate them, every stone was a weapon and water was a more effective healer than any surgeon. But what happens when a fifth element is discovered, and the one girl with the power to manipulate it can’t figure out how to use it?
My name is Akira Ikegami, and I have a power. I don’t really know what it is, or how to use it, or how it came about. But it’s definitely powerful.
My best friend is an Earthbender—he can manipulate rocks and the ground. Just last week he was able to shift a jagged, shiny, dark grey rock to me from three hundred yards away. And he’s only a novice.
My other friend, she’s an Airbender. Even though the air is transparent, gaseous, and you can’t feel it, it sure has lots of power. She can even fly with the help of a glider.
Not only that, my younger sister is a Waterbender. Give her a canteen of regular water and she can freeze it, turn it into gas, manipulate it, or sooth wounds. The water she uses is just normal H2O—clear, scentless, and some small bubbles when you shake it. But she can do amazing things.
Then, there’s my dad. He’s a Paperbender. Folds origami in any way imaginable, from a bird to a plane, a flower, a panda bear. He can take regular paper, bent, wrinkled, and thin, and transform it into something really cool.
Those are the four main elements, and if you’re fortunate enough to be a Bender, it’s one of those. Typically. Because I know I have this power, but it doesn’t fall into any of those categories.
It’s special. And not in a good way. It’s weird, disfigured. Thinking about it will either make you embarrassed or just laughing from the sheer absurdity of it… Okay. I’ll just say it.
I’m a Pom-pom Bender. I have a way with pom-poms. I manipulate them, move them around in the air, transform them into different shapes. When I have one in my hand, I feel a certain energy.
I know it must sound crazy and really weird. But it’s true.
The problem is, I don’t know how to use this power. Pom-pom bending won’t help defend you, or sooth wounds, or fold a panda bear from a piece of recycled paper. The most it’ll get you is a gig at the circus. Manipulating a fluffy, 1’ in diameter, blue pom-pom isn’t exactly a claim to fame.
I’ve been practicing defense techniques with them, using the pom-poms as a shield, of sorts, for defense. But my maneuvers really look more like a dance routine than anything else. It’s so stupid. I can’t figure it out.
How is a dance routine going to help anything? It’s not useful, it’s not practical, it’s not even amusing, like shifting rocks from nine hundred feet away.
Dancing around with pom-poms, extending them into the air with flips and spins, manipulating them. It’s not exactly a lost art.
But…. I can’t help but feel stupid….
What if it’s a found art?
Author’s note: At the time of print, Akira Ikegami was teaching her own Dance of the Pom-Pom, informally known as ‘Cheerleading’, at a monetary in southern Japan, training the new Pom-pom Benders in the way of the pom-pom. Things have been working out quite well, and other universities are picking up the trend of educating this new generation of Benders.”
Alright, that’s it. Hope ya liked it 😉 It was a good break from most of the normal boring essays I have to write. And it was amusing.
Mom says bed or I get grounded. I think, bed. Hehe.
~~aLoHaFoWl, the LaSt wOrDbEnDeR
Cool, Aloha. 🙂 You have a way of making writing sound like a novel and a humorous joke at the same time.
You’re blog gives me a lift, you crack me up. *rolling on floor laughing* AlohaFowl. Baha! 😀