^

my heart aches

this world is so messed up

there’s bliss and suffering intermingled,

a shout of joy impaled on crimson lips,

the crimson flows, blood that is life and death

if a tree falls in the forest with no one to hear, does it make a sound?

how can I live so well off in comparison, but complain?

I’m so blessed. I don’t even know it. I can’t comprehend.

Your love is amazing, steady and unchanging, Your love is a mountain, firm beneath my feet

Which is good, ’cause the rest of the world crumbles around me.

Around us.

Together. I always forget. Never alone, even when I’d rather be.

But that would be hell. Literally. Life without God. I don’t understand. I never will. I’m not dumb. I just can’t get it. No one can.

What is human love? Why do we wait our whole lives for some prince charming to sweep us off our feet, when the truest and richest form of love has existed for two thousand and ten years, when the real Prince Charming has already swept us away in a flood of undying–ETERNAL–devotion?

Divorce rate is 50%. Why take your chances? You know you’re going to fail somehow. Is life worth living. Is it. I don’t even have the heart to ask, because I already know the answer. There’s no need for the punctation if it’s already solved in your head.

the only reason I live my life is for You. That’s the only reason I’ll ever have, the only reason I ever WANT to have, and if I have any other reason for living that preceeds the love I give God, it would be better not to live at all.

if I give my devotion to one above You, kill me. Please. Don’t spare my life. i’m not an american idol. i’m not a star or a spark or a supreme dooming ruler of a marshmellow, much less the universe. i’m so young. so inexperienced. i know nothing. i will not know anything of value until i die.

but yet somehow life is worth living, we carry on. it’s not fun. it doesn’t make sense. life shouldn’t be fulfilling, it’s not.

You are.