Here’s what you missed last week on The Bachelorette: Fictional Edition! Season One:
The drama of twelve (fictional) guys battling over one tragically beautiful bachelorette continued, escalating into the climax of imaginary reality TV show romance.
Artemis Fowl continues to hold a strong lead, but battles Dr. Billy (Ph.D in horribleness) for control of Australia, and thus Aloha’s heart. Zack Fair gained a startling lead when said bachelorette accidentally stumbled upon his final-wishes cutscene on Youtube, effectively winning the heart-wrenching pitty vote. Zuko still remains in the running due to ageless hotness. (See what I did there? Firebender?)
New last week, Fiyero jumped from #3 to position #1 when the bachelorette saw a live preformance of Wicked, after having read the book and preforming some minimal fangirling for several months. Alex Rider continues to hold as a notable mention, solely based upon his actions in Crocodile Tears, where he singlehandedly takes down an entire underground drug-transfer facility. Wing, the only OC in the running, inspires with his taco-induced madness, however, after some problems in his own fantasy-land (a runaway antagonist and some supporting-character issues), he regrettably resigned from the show. Rodney McKay, representing Stargate: Atlantis maintains a steady stream of support from viewers and fangirls alike. Ned the Piemaker and Shawn Spencer the semi-Psychic (try saying that ten times fast), the newest nominees, are gradually dropping in rank, but continue to remain a fan favorite.
Who will win The Bachelorette: Fictional Edition, and Aloha’s heart? That’s up to the viewers.
Results to be reviewed and revealed ASAP, so get those votes in!