Shin (noun): a device for finding furniture in the dark

And other hilarious definitions taken from the humor site Grouchy Rabbit, made by the creators of Dear Blank, Please Blank.

Drama (noun) – When Sarah likes Mike but Mike is going out with Jane when Jane actually likes Dylan but Dylan likes Sarah so Dylan asks out Sarah and Jane gets mad and breaks up with Mike so she can go out with Dylan then Sarah asks out Ty instead and Ty likes Hanna and Hanna likes Mike so Hanna asks out Mike and Jane gets jealous so she tries to make up with Mike.

Study (verb) – The act of texting, eating and watching TV with an open textbook nearby.

Tomorrow (noun) – The best time to do everything you had planned for today.

No offense (phrase) – A phrase used to introduce a highly offensive comment.

America (noun) – Most reliable place to live if you wish to offend someone with the phrase, “Merry Christmas.”

The Game (noun) – Something you just lost.

Science Fair (noun) – A time for parents to show how talented they are.

Sarcasm (noun) – The brain’s natural defense against the less intelligent.

Irony (adjective) – The opposite of wrinkly.

Haha (noun) – This conversation is now over.

Due tomorrow (phrase) – Do tomorrow.

Gullible (adjective) – A commonly used word that is not found in the dictionary.

And you were there (phrase) – The only way to get someone to listen to your dream, whether they were actually there or not.

Karma (noun) – Throwing a banana the first lap in Mario Kart and hitting it the next.

Debate (noun) – Used to catch defish.

Cheerios (noun) – Doughnut seeds.

Synonym (noun) – A word you use when you can’t figure out how to spell the other one.

Sweater (noun) – Something you wear when your mother is cold.

Summer (noun) – The season where you never know what day it is.

Internet (noun) – Where grammar goes to die.

Babysit (verb) – To get paid to watch TV and eat other people’s food while doing your homework.

All-nighter (noun) – School’s way of collecting on all those hours of naptime in kindergarden, with interest.

Chip bag (noun) – A bag for storing air.

Evening News (noun) – Where they begin with “Good Evening” and proceed to tell you why it’s not.

Irony (noun) – telling Lord Voldemort he’s being nosy.

Group project (noun) – A project in which you are forced to do all of the work of the lazy students that the professor decided to group you with.

Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day? (phrase) – Nerd speak for “you look hot.”

Homework (noun) – What you should be doing right now.

Etc (acronym) – End of thinking capacity.

Teenager (noun) – When you’re too young for half the things you want to do and too old to do the other half.

Defeat (noun) – Dunking a cookie for a fraction of a second too long and watching half of it disintegrate into the milk.

Irony (noun) – When your friend says they “did good” on their English exam.

Life (noun) – A terminal disease contracted at birth.

Cell phone (noun) – 50.3% Clock, 20.2% Flashlight, 10.4% Camera, 5.1% Awkward situation avoider, 4.9% Texting, and 0.1% Actually calling people.

Trail mix (noun) – A snack containing M&M’s and some other stuff that you throw away.

Just kidding (phrase) – A phrase used to get away with something you said and fully meant.

Summer (noun) – The season where you never know what day it is.

(Disclaimer: I didn’t write any of those. I don’t own Grouchy Rabbit. My socks don’t match today.)

(Two things to apologize for: 1) having 5 pages of backed-up comments I need to moderate, reply to, smile at, and tackle, and 2) reading all your guys’ blogs on my email or just straight through your URL, but without commenting. Both are due to an insane lack of free time in which I can blog, so don’t think it’s cause I don’t love you. One of these days when I have some time (and a couple liters of Coke >.<) I’ll try to go through and comment on my and your posts. Promise.)

About Aloha

A teen writer and future world ruler. Llamas make me happy.
This entry was posted in Misc. Posts, Nerd Fun and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to Shin (noun): a device for finding furniture in the dark

  1. Nia says:

    Perfection.

  2. BushMaid says:

    Hil.Ari.Ous. 😀 *is now reading more, thanks to Aloha*

    HOMEWORK (acronym) – Half Of My Energy Wasted On Random Knowledge.

  3. Olivia says:

    Yesterday I told my mom, “I don’t understand. I keep seeing this thing that gullible is not in the dictionary, but it’s on dictionary.com!”

    She grinned. I stared blankly, having no idea what was so funny.

    “Olivia,” she began.

    Then I got it.

    We fell in heaps laughing. My mom is still laughing about it.

    But hey! *tugs on blonde hair* I’ve got an excuse! xP

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